Month: May 2020

Isolation Diary: Sometimes the answer isn’t obvious. Or often. And one just has to offer what one has to offer. At the moment. Hoping that others will join in the dialogue. Understanding that living is a team effort. Yes, many glorify individualism, going it alone, the rebel, the gunslinger. This is an American icon. But, also, we are the United states. Ack! These contradictions, how can one find a path? In my experience, and in my opinion……consider the concept of the Holon (thank you, Joe Jordan) Something that is wholly itself and also wholly part of a larger whole. Of course, the question is….what is one’s understanding, concept, of the larger whole? People like me? People like me and also people mostly like me? People? No, no, wait, those people who are so different than me aren’t actually part of the whole, are they? I have to stop here on this train of thought. Other than this, it’s been a good day. A visit from Maggie, Adam, and Fig, during which Fig insisted I hold him and dance with him. So, of course, I did. Until I didn’t. Because he is heavy after awhile. And eventually that was ok, too. And, for me, seeing a new life, a new person, develop is simply fascinating.

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Henry H.
Well done, Ruth!

Paul B.
I stay 6 ft away from my 3 month old grandson. fortunately my violin is close at hand. I haven’t practiced this much or this well ever.

Ruth Silveira
3 months is still so new. Good to be careful. Lucky child to be treated to your music!

Holly B.
Bravo Paul!!!!!

Isolation Diary: Today I interacted with several non-family members! What a day of expansion! A family, friends of Maggie, came over to enjoy my backyard for awhile. I hid 19 hats for them to find. Big hit. Why do I have 19 hats? Tush. I have 3 times that many. Why do I have so many hats? Some are costumes, yes, but others… you know, they accumulate . So you all don’t have bins of hats? Huh. Second encounter: when last I drove my car (out to Pasadena on the 29th to celebrate Fig’s birthday) my car gave me a ‘low tire pressure’ signal. So today, finding myself with no excuse not to handle this, I drove to my neighborhood gas station/repair place and asked for help. Given. A very nice, competent, young man found I had a huge screw stuck in one of my tires. Fixed. I just LOVE when people have the tools for the job! He was wearing a mask, I was wearing a mask. And sunglasses. (which I didn’t remove because they are prescription and I just think of them as glasses) I realized my face was really obscured from him. Yet I think he understood my appreciation and gratitude for fixing this problem so quickly. Gotta love these communicative cars.

Isolation Diary: It was a good day.

Isolation Diary: A quiet day. Until…bang, bang, bang. I was…I admit, at my computer playing a game….hey, a transition period between two…uhm…activities… Knock, Knock, Knock. Sounded like it was coming from my back door. That would be odd. My backdoor is not accessible to the random passerby. Disturbed people have harassed me in the not so distant past so I am on alert and I am here alone. I cautiously approach the kitchen. The knocking is not the back door but the roof! The skylight! Someone is trying to break the skylight?! My house has one room upstairs, like a cockpit, I ascend the stairs. At the top there is a window that looks out on the portion of roof that contains the skylight. Not a villain. A raven. Or crow. Whichever. Hammering on the skylight, trying to break a nut. Why there? I shout at it, the bird ignores me but flies off anyway. I have lived in this house for a long time (I just added up the years), a long time, and this is a first. With the bird. In other news: I continued with my half hour of ballroom dancing and my long form tai chi. Having established this daily routine for a month or more, it is very hard to find a good excuse to not do it. Being home and all. I simply add this as a possible caution when you are thinking of establishing possibly ‘good’ routines in your life.

Several times in a week a clearly disturbed man had walked past my house talking to himself and whomever he was imagining. Then one day he stayed on the corner, going back and forth into the intersection. He was across the street from my house. He would set off deliberately, as though he had somewhere to go, then would turn around and come back. He would sit for awhile, then get up and do it all again. He began to throw rocks at cars. I was alone in the house with Fig taking a nap. I called 911. Then the man came over to my house, up to the front door, banged on the window of the front door, stumbled around the porch, deliberately knocked over the potted tree. I called the police again. Eventually they came but the man was gone. By then. Another time, I think previous to this event, this same person, not quite so disturbed had come to my door asking for someone. And this same person at another time threw a rock at my side French windows. It was after all this that Maggie insisted I call her every night to check in. And I have been doing that ever since.

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Holly B.
You seem so happy….Must have had a good husband!!!

Henrietta C.
You are on the right and righteous path. I admire your routine, Meanwhile, the ravens (crows?) reclaim their land… “Quoth the raven, Nevermore.”

Isolation Diary: Visitors today! Maggie, Adam, and Fig. Then dear friends Julie/Roxanne and Richard. Family entered the house, friends stayed outside in the yard. And then later a D&D session. And because of all this activity today, I was able to cheerfully accomplish some mundane tasks. Like laundry. Like cleaning the floors. If I have nothing but mundane tasks on my daily To Do list, in this corona virus world, I am likely to ignore them, be depressed by their low level necessity. I have bills to pay. There they are. Here I am. So? Also, it seems that on-line scammers are also trapped in their homes and eager to exercise their skills. After a long hiatus with no scams, I am beset by one (?) who writes with an old typewriter font, different name each time, and who has apparently hacked into my participation in porn websites. Hmm. That’s a give away right there. Another has offered me a job! Personal assistant but the duties can be provided from my home. Sounds perfect!

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Kathi C.
I got the porn email too. Honestly it was shocking how abusive it was. I’m still waiting to see my porn video released since I didn’t pay the ransom.

Ruth Silveira
Yes, the email was aggressively negative. I got three in a series with escalating threats and abuse. Then after a few days I got another, always a different name, that started at the beginning again. And even though it is all absurd and even laughable, still a shield needs to be placed between myself and the negative flowing from this email.

Heatherlynn N.G.
Evidently there are a lot of us who watch porn and didn’t realize it! I got the ransom email too!

Isolation Diary: I now have over 1000 unread emails. Most are political and end up asking for a donation. But first my opinion is solicited. Over and over and over again. And the initial sentence alternates between ‘horrible news’ and ‘great news’, although the ‘horrible news’ has an edge. And I don’t know what to believe. And I would really appreciate someone asking for my input without asking for money. I can’t judge what is real anymore. Is Katie Porter really starving for funds? Is the Post Office really going to close in June? Not sure. So I do nothing. Every day I delete a few emails and then just get discouraged and move on to something else. Please make this stop!!! In other news: I am sewing a sort of loose and long shirt for myself. I have made some choices I would like to take back but can’t. Have to work with them. Don’t expand this to be a cloaked statement about my life in general. In general, my few major decisions? I am happy with.

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Natasha P.
I hope you are able to put these diary entries into a printed book when this is all said and done. You are truly a wonderful writer, Ruth!

Isolation Diary: I have been without internet access for almost a day. I am cribbing off Jessie’s at the moment. I sort of wish I had missed this day entirely. Must have been a bad news day. I won’t have home wifi until Monday afternoon. And for some reason the Personal Hotspot that was functioning perfectly last month has disappeared. Hey, something to do tomorrow! So little or no FB or email until Monday, if all goes well. If you don’t hear from me by Tuesday night, somebody come knocking on my door, please. I may have dumped the pieces of 8 or 9 jigsaw puzzles on the floor in a mixed up heap and fallen asleep while trying to put the puzzles together.

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Susan J.
Well, maybe the Internet is highly overrated? Of course, that’s easy for me to say, since I’m connected. You’re a wildly creative woman. Just imagine you’re in a time capsule and have been catapulted back to, well, 1970. Or maybe 1670? Yeah! Turn off all electricity and light some candles and…okay. I’ll shut up. Even I’m annoying me!

Holly B.
Dear Ruth, My life has been a jigsaw puzzle. Wish I could come and knock on your door and share a story or two.

Walt K.
Ruthie, I read stay-in-placers pissing & moaning over their self–imposed confinement and the travails they “must endure.” But not you. You’ve shown it’s doable and have managed routines enough to keep you occupied with a daily fresh attitude while keeping your head above water. For myself, being disabled, I’ve been living in the same bed in the same nursing home going on seven years now and what with accepting fate, some judicious planning, meditation and friends, often I barely find sufficient hours in the day. It’s not all banquets and bicycles but there is hardly a justifiable alternative ~~ as you have shown. Your postings are much appreciated.

Henrietta C.
It might be a great opportunity…who knows…to return to Tai Chi and a direct relationship with the present, instead of a mediated one. But if this happened here…I’d feel exactly the same. Wait, it has happened here. But last year, because we had so many electrical outages in the deep woods, we actually got a generator. So we don’t lose the internet anymore. Although we maybe should…

Isolation Diary: Here I am again. Spectrum techie fiddled with the cable and switched out some hardware and …hello.

And none of the problem was my fault! In the 4 days I have been absent 2 nice things happened worth mentioning. One: the Saturday night D & D session was held with the 3 adventurers (me, Jessie, Duncan) at Jessie’s house as I had no internet, Maggie the DM at her house. Great fun having the adventurers all together. Second: On Saturday I took a walk to Larchmont Blvd. to pick up some pre-paid coffee beans from Peet’s. I left the house with just my little pocket sized bag for my phone, and I added my ID and a CC, you know, just in case. Just starting my walk I found my next door neighbors of many years out in front of their house. I hadn’t seen them in weeks. Actually I was getting concerned. So I was happy to see them and took out my phone to shut off the podcast I was listening to so we could have a chat. Done, all good, off to Larchmont, got the coffee, walked back. Gone maybe half an hour or 40 minutes. I live in a residential area, single family homes and multi-family buildings of various sizes all mixed up. Across the street from me is a Rosicrucian meeting house, usually only open on the weekends. On the next corner, a short block away is a library. So on the weekend there is significant sidewalk activity. But not now in covid times. So when I approached my house I found my credit card lying undisturbed on the sidewalk where it had fallen, I’m guessing, when I pulled my phone out of my little bag to silence it so I could talk to my neighbors. Totally inappropriate to thank covid19. Still, it is so nice when something that could have been bad doesn’t happen.

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Joyce H.
Joyce posted 20 pics of a Be Safe bee.

Isolation Diary: No outside contact today. Just me. And I am thinking that ultimately I will be ok. If I continue to stay at home and social distance. For the rest of my life. Or until there is a vaccine. But most people can’t hunker down for a year or 18 months. And the money being spent with much less coming in……what does that mean for the near future? Personally and statewide and nationally? I understand the urgent desire to get back to work and am also appalled at the nearly complete lack of support and plan for a rational response from the WH. And then I shift back to my family. Hey, help them! Get them right. Then back to me, my personal world has fewer connections, I have fewer interactions, and my experience is curtailed. And slowly slowly……I may not care anymore.

Isolation Diary: Such a contrast today. My own enjoyable experience with my Zoom Improv group and a visit from the family and then hearing and reading about the insane (to my mind) actions of the Wisconsin Supreme Court and the House Republicans deciding they can’t support actions to lower drug prices because they are required by Trump to destroy the ACA, and the loss of Katie Hill’s former seat to a Rep. (I think). And now that I am receiving emails again I have a hundred new appeals for money. And so….I pour myself another glass of wine and sign off.

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Henrietta C.
With you every step of the way, leading inexorably to another glass of wine..