Category: Isolation Diary

Isolation Diary: Today I looked at the layers of paper that have piled up on my desk. I did not attack them, I approached slowly, they remained placid. Most of these various shaped envelopes seem to be from the investment companies in which I have accounts. Do I want to open them or let them pile up a little longer? Having nothing else to do, I did look around for a bit for an alternative, I picked up my letter opener and began slitting open the envelopes. Ah, notices of trades. And then a prospectus or two. I can handle these. I exercise oversight thusly: neatly slit open the envelope, remove the contents, unfold the papers, take 2 seconds to determine the nature but not the substance of the information, slide both envelope and contents into the wastebasket.

Also, I put away the two scripts that had been my focus before the shut down. I was rehearsing “One Way Ticket to Oregon” and prepping “The Cassette Chronicles.” They had been resting on various surfaces, moved here, moved there, you know, ready when needed. But…now tucked away. So it goes.

“The Cassette Chronicles” by Corey K. was intended for The Hollywood Fringe.

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Jeff L.
I think it’s wise to stalk those layers of paper, you never know how they might react to sudden movements!

DeAnne M.
Hugs

Noel B.
Just for the record, I enjoy reading your diary.

Susan J.
Moi aussi!

Natasha P.
your posts are giving me life. thanks for sharing with all of us.

Natascha C.A.
Love your diary entries.

Laura E.F.
Love your updates!

We were all so lonely.

Isolation Diary: Feeling much better, almost normal. I’d like to take in a movie, get out of the house, you know? Noooo! I have to get used to staying home all over again.

While sending Duncan a Message from my iPad (he now has a kid’s account administered by Jessie, set up because of this isolation situation) I touched a button I hadn’t ever touched before and found Messenger requests. (I rarely use my iPad for this) And there was a message sent in mid 2018 (!) from a cousin that I know of but do not know. The Portuguese side of the family. He was asking for information about my paternal grandfather. Which I may have, actually. I replied. Now we are in contact. He grows walnuts in Modesto. I like walnuts. I use a lot around Christmas time when a bake a whole LOT of cookies. I wonder….have I been baking with my cousin’s walnuts?

I was cheered by General Todd Semonite of the Army Corp of Engineer when he appeared on the Rachel Maddow show. Direct information, specifics, very few extra words, a grasp of what can be done and how. And doing it. My god, what a relief. Nearly died again in our D & D game, had to be cured. I need better armor or something.

I did not hear from my Modesto cousin again. The General mentioned above was speaking about how the Army was going to help with the extreme burden on the hospitals because of the influx of severely ill Covid patients. His appearance was cheering because of the contrast to the information coming from Trump which could in no way be trusted by any reasonable person.

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Claudette W.
Your posts lift my spirits.

Natascha C.A.

Aaron F.
Find a way to raise your AC. A Dungeons and Dragons comment.

Susan J.
Mmmmmmwah! (from a safe distance, of course)

Susan J.
And thanks for the heads-up about the Maddow interview with General Semonite. It was encouraging. Too bad they don’t replace the idiot-in-chief’s daily briefings on TV with this man. This is the information we need and the information we crave.

Isolation Diary: Today 2 of my longtime improv friends and I experimented with playing improv on Zoom. We spent a lot of time dealing with technical matters. glitches. A sound issue. We still had a good time but…..similar to ‘road rage’, there is ‘techno rage’, or do you have a better name for it.

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Jeff W.
Yes, and?

Ruth Silveira
Yes, and do you mind if I smash you to smithereens?

(Written after midnight)

Okay….given your food supplies at this moment, and this was it, all you were going to have until the cavalry comes, what is the last thing you would eat? For me, it would be a jar of salty and sour lemon slices that Maggie bought and left here. I finally opened the jar and tried one. This would be the very last thing I would eat. Why do I still have them? I will have to examine that.

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Rebecca L.
Bagged beans.So healthy.Not likely I will ever bother to prepare them…

Aviva P.
Probably the roommates

Lemon B.
Dried beans

Guy P.
A tin of sardines.

Shaela C.
Pumpkin chocolate chip bread.
cheese.

Linda M.
My chickens

Alisa T.
Dried milk, powdered egg, power bars, and rice and beans. (I still have an earthquake supply cupboard that hasn’t been touched.)

(Written before midnight)

Isolation Diary: For the first time I had a sad phase today. After a delightful FaceTime episode with Maggie, Adam, and Fig. I can’t hold Fig. When he was over here before Covid and his parents were off working, I would hold him and we would dance together. He loved that. I’m in another sad phase right now. Shake it off, Ruth! Okay. Feeling so much better (I’ve had a cold, you recall), I got back to tai chi (at home) and dancing (by myself) and the garden. And, of course, D and D. I have survived, barely, another battle and we are leveling up.

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DeAnne M.
I got sad this weekend, too. We all need some hugs. Love you.

Susan J.
Oh, I hear you about the sadness that knocks on our doors periodically. A most unwelcome guest! I sometimes think I’m going through the stages of grief. Last week, it was anger. We, too, have enjoyed a virtual Fig to hug and giggle with, but that’s been the norm for us all along. I feel your pain! In the meantime, choose happiness and frolic in that gorgeous garden of yours.

Isolation Diary: Thank you to David Mayes for bringing us the substance of the daily ‘briefings’ from our (ouch) president. Most of us couldn’t bare to watch as they were rambling, repetitive, self-serving, and full of dodgy information. But, back to me, today I made fig newtons. Made with fig sauce I made last year from my own figs and froze. These are good, the best I’ve ever made. What am I going to do with them? Maybe I will leave some on my neighbors’ porches, ring the bell and run away. Some Fools (Sacred Fools Theater Company members) got together on Zoom and tried to sing a song. So nice to see these people! Also, as stated in a post elsewhere, I worked on cartoonish sketches of Fig. Examples below. The idea being that maybe I could draw a story featuring a Fig like character. Maybe. And some work in the garden, tussling with the devouring vine. I am safely back inside now.

I decided not make a Fig story, he was still too young for such a thing.

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Ruth Silveira
Sorry about the orientation.

DeAnne M.
Adorable

Donnelle P.
Oh keep and freeze those cookies! I’d probably toss any food that came from a neighbor in this virus-y climate. Hold onto them to eat or give as a gift later!

Ruth Silveira
Yeah, that’s probably right. I mean the unpracticality of leaving homemade cookies for a neighbor. I did freeze most of them, to be eaten or distributed later.

Susan J.
Oh! Little cartoon Fig! You’ve captured him already.

Joyce H.
Love your drawings, stories and baking adventures! Be safe in those vines

Isolation Diary: How long have I been on my own? My last big grocery shopping was Monday, March 9. On Thursday, March 12, things began shutting down; my rehearsal was canceled. The idea of social distancing and staying at home gaining traction. March 14, my last tai chi class before the Y shut down. Also a quick trip to Pavilions to pick up a few things, noticed the absence of toilet paper and water. By Sunday, March 15, I was feeling lonely and Jessie and Duncan came to visit. Alone until Wednesday, March 18, when Adam, Maggie, and Fig came for a visit. I hadn’t seen them in awhile because Fig had a cold. I was impatient for a visit, too soon, I caught the cold. But not immediately; on Friday, March 20, I walked to Larchmont to pack up pre- ordered coffee beans from Peet’s. And then…I’ve just been here at home. So, my strict isolation is just shy of 2 weeks but my, let’s say, ‘restricted isolation’ has been about 19 days. And maybe 30 more to come. So naive! How not to feel useless?Why do I need to feel useful? Because…..one of our human characteristics, maybe our most important one, is our potential to be useful to other humans. I am reminded of a show that Joe Jordan wrote, “Holon”. A holon is is something that is simultaneously a whole and a part; something individual and an integral part of a larger whole. We are all that. So here in isolation, I am my active individual self but my connecting self is pining.
In other news: I battled the devouring vine again. Oh, come on, you might be thinking, it’s a vine, a plant, why do you go on so about this lower life form? Ha! You innocents. Vines grow while you sleep, this is well known. Also when you are not looking. Truly, if you constantly stare at a vine, it is paralyzed, dormant. Take your eye off it…whoosh! There goes your ping-pong table. Hey, how’d the table get covered in leaves? My marauding vine has climbed up several large plants, bushes, trees, whatever, and created a canopy. This vine has attaching tendrils. To pull each ‘branch’ down takes strength, and often I simply can’t pull it down and have to sever the vine and let the left over just die up at the top the tree and turn brown. And I’m up on a ladder and not feeling so secure.
Wishing you all good health!

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Walt K.
Your diary must be three feet thick by now. Quick, find a publisher. You’ll make more than enough to buy a new ping pong table.

Isolation Diary: butterflies, bees, little birds, and me, enjoying the garden. Maybe 8 years ago, Maybe 10, I have a very poor sense of passing time, I asked myself, “Should I go on a longish cruise or transform my side yard into a garden?” I chose the garden. Tonight I heard from someone on TV…an expert?, a pundit?, a comedian?…that our ‘stay at home’ life might last through May. Whoa. That’s a long time. We are not in a holding pattern, we are in a temporary adaptive way of living. So structures must be made. What to do every day? To maintain mental, physical, and spiritual (if applicable) health. By the way, I think all payments, debts, and taxes, should be either forgiven for this time or held in abeyance for the duration of this shut it all down policy.

Isolation Diary: Beginning to create a routine. Well, not exactly. A few things I will do in a day but not necessarily in order or at a particular time. I will work in the garden. Or maybe just watch the butterflies. I will dance. Or really just move continuously for awhile. I will do tai chi, long form. And I will encounter in a positive, effective way at least one of the many projects that have been sitting on my back burner for never mind how long. Also, I resolve to reach out through FaceTime to my dearest friend every few days, for my mental health and for hers. Possible but not guaranteed productive time spent today: I worked on transferring photos of my theater company’s props to an inventory list. And…to challenge myself…I cleaned off my work table which had the detritus of a couple of months’ concerns and projects including my taxes. Clean now. Open. Empty. Inviting. What will fill this space?

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Noel B.
Routines are good

Isolation Diary: So after a day of following my ‘regimen’: garden work, dancing, tai chi, and projects–today those were refurbishing a rusted garden ornament (a frog that needed to be repainted), looking again at a children’s story, making decisions about a possible quilt; plus chatting with my brother and a friend, and after a delightful two hours with my family playing D&D, I told my family I have to go to the grocery store. Finally. A muted response. So i said I would look into ordering online. That was unsatisfactory. I texted that I needed to go myself. They are not having that. They are going to do the shopping for me. I am a bundle of emotions right now. I haven’t set foot off my property in over a week. Will my car even start? My daughters are concerned for me. But hasn’t it always been the other way? Me being concerned for them? Will I be able to have hummus for lunch? Maybe I can make it myself if there are canned beans on the shelf? Where is all the food? Why can’t I hug my little grandson?

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Mandi M.H.
RUTH. Stay home. Get groceries delivered ok? I know that you want to get out. But please? Stay home?

Ruth Silveira
ok.

Ruth Silveira
Although I’m crying right now.

Mandi M.H.
Ugh I wish I could hug you for real…

Ernie G.
Heart means I’m sending you Love. That’s all I can do. Well no there’s more! I’ll be going out for groceries tomorrow. Can I get you anything?

Ruth Silveira
My daughters seem to be on the case. Ernie! I am so happy to know you are well! I am virtually hugging you really tightly. I love you!

Shaela C.
Hang in there Ruth. It’s going to be bad. We are heading into the storm. Stay home. If you need, I can bring you some food. Let me know. I’ve decontaminated it – but you can always decontaminate it again (recommended).

Sabrina A.
Give us a wishlist and we’ll bring you things when we vacation in your yard!Ruth SilveiraAw, thanks. I have a grassy patch, a nice bench, a tiny stream, and paths for the young ‘uns to run around on.

Sabrina A.
Ruth Silveira but seriously, think about what you want, we might have it. No paper towels sorry to say.

Danielle O.
Please stay home. First, because they love you and don’t need this added fear. Second because the risk to your age group is so much higher. Please. I’m not letting my mom shop either. She thinks she’s healthy so she’ll be fine. I think it’s not worth the risk. It just isn’t.

DeAnne M.
I’m so sorry

Rafeal C.
This too, shall pass.

Maggie M.
You’re the most independent person i know and its deeply existentially disorienting not to be able to do a simple thing like going to the store. And no one likes being lectured or scolded. This is all so crazy. Im sorry its this way. I miss you so much. Home made hummus sounds yummy.

Jen D.
Oh Ruth, I get it mama. You know you can take a drive, if you can ignore the temptation to stop and go in anywhere.

Corey K.
Hugs.

Holly B.
What a rich full life you live; filled with love. I am learning new ways to live my life through reading your daily diary; you are an inspiration for me in times of stress. Love, Holly

Joyce H.
Hi Ruth, hold tight, the next few weeks are going to be rough. But, please stay put. No need to chance getting the virus. We need you well for all the fun we’ll have soon!

We were still not expecting what actually happened, how long we were isolated.

Susan J.
Well, I’ll add my voice here. As Maggie said, your independence is being challenged, which is so outside the norm for you. Add to that the fear, outrage, and frustration which is all-consuming. And, the icing on the cake: to be kept apart from baby hugs and snuggles is just unbearable. Reading the responses from your dear friends is heartening. You are loved and will be cared for-just as you care for others when you can. It’s just weird to be in that receiving position, but it’s based purely on science (the science of medical risk). This has nothing to do with who we are and what we’re capable of. I, for one, find strength in reading about the creative ways in which you fill your days in your lovely diary entries. Scream, cry, and punch a pillow every now and then. Ride the waves. No judgment, cause we’re all in the same rocky boat. Love to you, Ruth, and lots of virtual hugs.

Susan J.
And, not for nothing, I was met with be same muted response when I said I was going grocery shopping. AND my attempt at delivery also failed miserably. I’ve decided to order online and do a curbside pick-up next time we need food. Wish me luck!

Jeffrey W.
Ruth, wouldn’t you feel pretty stupid if you went shopping and then got the virus?

Ruth Silveira
Yes, I would. And I would probably feel worse if Jessie went shopping and got the virus! What to do? Now, most people survive. I know two who have. Would I? Would she?

And those questions hung in the air like cobwebs drifting down from the ceiling. We try to bat them away as we go through our days.