Category: Isolation Diary

(But April 12 to me)

Isolation Diary: Time in the garden. Responses from friends I reached out to. Conversations begun. Continued editing a children’s story I wrote long ago. Danced. Tai chi. and as I write this it is already Monday and my birthday. I like my birthday. Late Sunday afternoon my Ring notified me that there was movement at my door. I heard voices. Opening the app, which takes way too long!, I realized I knew the people on my front porch. They were Jessie (daughter) and Duncan (grandson). They were putting up happy birthday decoration which….if I didn’t have a Ring and didn’t hear them …i might have been delightfully surprised on Monday morning when I went out to pick up the paper. As it was, i got to talk in person with them. A highly valued treat. The sign says Happy Birthday Ruth, you can’t quite see that in the photo.

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Claudette W.
Happy birthday, Ruth !

And after that a whole lot of happy birthday messages—Emily K., Jeff L., Natalie R., Natasha P, Elizabeth Y., Colin S., Laura O., Joe HK, Joe J., Jaime A., Christie M., Carla Jo., Jeremy A., Crystal K., DeAnne M., Anna M., Jamie W., Lise H., Joyce H., Ed G., Susan J.., Rik K., Matt A., Shannon E., Holly B., Hope W., Rafeal C., Vonie RA., Madeleine I., Keong S., Carl G., Aaron M., Cindy C-I., Phyllis B., Jen C.

(And to me this is about April 13th)

Isolation Diary: My birthday. Thank you everyone for your happy birthday wishes. I was not in complete isolation today as Maggie, Adam, and Fig came over and that was a good gift. I was presented with a small sketch of myself wearing a crown. I now have my Queen ID card. I believe I can now get free admission for myself and my retinue to any castle in the known world. (A new isolation project–how does one acquire a retinue?) In other news; I have 694 unread emails. Why? Most are alerts of dire circumstances that would be helped tremendously if I donated some money. The number of frantic solicitations is so numerous my mind has gone numb. Of the remaining emails the majority are not to be missed deals from businesses I have purchased from. Some messages from local community sites. And….oh! A person. A friend. Here, in isolation, don’t I have time to take care of this overload? Time? The most elastic and personal concept there is. No. I don’t have time I want to spend on deleting these unwanted emails. There is time…..I have time……to do…..to be…..

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Jeff W.
I love these daily dispatches!

And more birthday messages: JJ M., Cydney., Danielle., Natascha C-A., Jessica H.

Isolation Diary: A lovely day today! Sunshine, garden, butterflies. And now full disclosure: I live alone in a house that is paid for. I am basically ‘retired’ and live on social security and pensions. I am affected by the stock market but not by my place of work being shut down. And that is all just timing. I live alone because my husband is dead and my children have their own homes. Although they are close (Burbank and Pasadena) and that is a blessing. All of you dear dear people have your own circumstances and challenges, some serious, I am sure. Why do I continue to post? Well, once you start something and continue long enough to sort of ‘establish’, how do you gracefully retreat? And also…I have been sending out … energy?…messages?…to those beyond my immediate and close circle since I was 8 years old. (that’s when I had my first acting class.) Why? Don’t know. And it’s haphazard at best.
Continuing with my actual day–making face masks for the family and a short but fun D and D session tonight as our trio of adventurers rescued Droop the goblin slave (animated by Maggie our DM) and we fed him maggots (his preferred food) and I gifted him with a scimitar. We are hoping he does not betray us.

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Jamie W.
Anything that ends “…we fed him maggots (his preferred food) and I gifted him with a scimitar. We are hoping he does not betray us” is clearly something I am happy to have read. Keep it up!-)

Mandi M.H.
I like these posts.

Suze C.
I enjoy your updates

Natalie R.
Your voice is so cherished.

Rafeal C.
I’m loving your daily Isolation Diary entries.

Isolation Diary: A gathering via Zoom today of a small improv group/class/workshop. We are experimenting with the circumstances. We made each other laugh. Laughter begins early in us humans. Fig, nearly a year old now, has been guffawing for a couple of months now. His brain is only beginning to organize words. His laughter is brought forth from actions. Is the laughter simply delight? Does he already see a deflection from the ‘norm’ and that is funny? Seeing a human form itself is so fascinating.

A lovely warm day but I did no work in the garden as I was busy with other things. Busy. Really? Yes, I didn’t complete my ‘to do’ list today. I spent the latter hours of the evening making a couple of face masks and listening to a book. I absolutely love listening to books. Often they accompany me as I work in the garden. Not always, sometimes I just listen to the garden. I listen to books while I am sewing….The hard part is finding the books. And the narrators I enjoy. And then getting involved in a series and getting to the end of the current book of the series and knowing there is a wait before the next book is recorded……… And that’s where I am now. More than half way through the latest book of a cherished series. Slowing down……. In the garden, I was listening to Terry Pratchett. At night, Terry Mancour.

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Natasha P.
you are such a wonderful writer, Ruth

Natalie R.
Mmm listening to Terry Pratchett, what a wonderful idea.

Holly B.
What a pistol; I so envy your energy level. I go much slower, but I read your posts every day to get ideas for things to do. You are a remarkable woman; last night I thought of you having babies. How wonderful for you now. Much love to you Ruth. Boomer

Isolation Diary: I pushed the boundaries of isolation today. Not my fault! I blame Jessie. She asked me to make some masks for her, Dean, and Duncan. I did. I had to delivery them, right? No telling when they would arrive if I mailed them. And then Maggie called and said Fig was fussy. Anyway we all ended up over at Jessie and Dean’s for lunch. Duncan had school but he got breaks. I held Fig. We older people, I include Duncan, did not hug but we did not keep 6 feet apart. That visit was so….what’s the word for being filled with delightful bubbles?….I was so…insert proper word…that I was able to do ‘desk work’ this evening. (This involved paper and numbers and a pen and a spread sheet.) I did not neglect the garden. The strawberry plants in my strawberry pot had sunk, compaction and loss of soil, so I fluffed their pillows, so to speak. It’s April but these little guys are weakly producing some fruit (recall that dry and mild February). Only one suitable for eating….which I did and it was delicious. So a day that included a variety of delights in this odd time. And I am grateful.

Isolation Diary: I haven’t commented upon political matters in these posts, I do that elsewhere. But some of the outrageousness of the president does color the mood of the day. The image of armed men on the steps of a public building in Michigan does make one want to make therapy a requirement for voting. All that aside:
My mood was lifted, in part, by a ‘birthday lunch’ with 2 dear friends. For years we have celebrated each other’s b’day by taking the celebrant out to lunch. Couldn’t happen but we did meet on Zoom. And at least I ate lunch. These 2 friends also happen to be improv buddies, so we chatted, you can guess about what, and other things, got that out of the way, and then played.
I don’t know how long I have been in isolation. Time contracts and expands. My computer tells me the date, if I happen to remember to look at my sidebar. And what day of the week is it? It’s Wednesday if all the gardeners in the neighborhood are making noise. Thursday if the noise is trash trucks. Otherwise, could be Flipsday. My time: in two days I’ll see Fig, tomorrow I must do laundry, I will run out of coffee in 3 days.

Isolation Diary: Without the Covid19 Stay at Home order I would not have ordered and had delivered an orange tree that is just wrong for the intended spot. Delivery cost was high, return pick up cost? Probably also high. So I will find a place for it and wait until I can get the tree I want, which doesn’t seem to be available anywhere at the moment. You see, 2 years ago, I bought two orange trees, one for me and one for Jessie and Dean as a Christmas present. Theirs is thriving, producing fruit at the moment, mine is a dying spindly thing, not having grown, having diminished in size. So I want a new one!! but not the one I just got. It’s in a big pot but it looks like a bush. I want a tree! I wasn’t thorough, I didn’t ask the right questions. I had an idea in my head but I didn’t ask for a mundane description of the actual thing. Because I was ordering my idea. Aaaarrgghh!
I have ordered other things during this last month at home. Some have arrived and some haven’t. Where are my books? My vitamins? My TP? Hey, there’s a UPS truck driving by, “Where’s my stuff?!” It drove by again. “Hey! Hey!” Nothing. No stuff.Day not all frustration: visit from Maggie, Adam, and Fig. Fig insisted we dance. Jessie did a shopping for me (I am not allowed out) and brought that by. I have lots of hummus at the moment, little yogurt.

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Susan J.
Who needs yogurt when you got hummus?

Ruth Silveira
One is breakfast, one is lunch.

Isolation Diary: Working with the mistake of yesterday. Trying to fix it.

I have a new ‘tree’ that doesn’t work in its planned spot. Below is a photo of my mini personal poppy field and the spindly and dying orange tree (very hard to see) and a leafy ‘bush/tree’ in a black pot next to it. Sometimes you just have to acknowledge the wrongness of things. I recall two times both regarding paint colors. One as I visited the set of Dracula: A Musical Nightmare while the main backdrop was being painted. Stop! I said. That won’t do. (I could do that as I was Director (with Jessie M.)) Shocked the painter, had to apologize. I don’t recall if I had approved the color, didn’t matter, it had to change. Same thing happened when our bedroom was being painted…..Chose a color. Saw it on the wall. Wrong. So wrong. So just stop. And so it is with this bush/tree. Adjustments must be made. I am sewing a doll for Fig. Creating a face. An attempt. And adjustment. And another one. Sewing the head. An attempt. And an adjustment. And another to the face.

I found another place for the bush/tree but that required the shifting of heavy pots and the digging up of plants with odd bulbous roots. Volunteers, I don’t know why they are here. Random things begin to grow in the garden. Sometimes I let them grow. Sometimes a friend will say, “Oh, by the way, that plant is poisonous.” What?! Let us all bless our friends and the people who know things that we ourselves don’t know. And I could ramble on as my brain unwinds but I won’t……..fixing things, fixing things…..

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Jaime A.
What a paradise you have made for yourself! (Erroneous tree, notwithstanding.)

Joyce H.
Don’t feel bad about your little orange tree. I have been nursing a lemon tree I planted last year, didn’t do well because of overgrowing morning glories and dog traffic. I’ve redone my little corner garden area where this little lemon lives and she’s doing much better. I’m hoping this summer she’ll sprout some inches while getting healthier! Best wishes on with your garden, and your doll making!!!

Kathi C.
I always loved your garden. All the paths and the little deck you later built. It’s beautiful and peaceful and serene.

Alisa T.
Replanting in Cactus mix is nice for Citrus. They like it. And deep water occasionally with some organic fertilizer. Your garden is lovely!

Isolation was still our best preventative.

Isolation Diary: I took a walk today. I hadn’t stepped off my property in…well, I don’t know how long and time has become insubstantial. But, emotionally, a long time. I walked to Larchmont to pick up a pre-ordered pound of coffee beans from Peet’s. Everyone near or on Larchmont Blvd. was wearing a mask, as was I. Upon returning home I changed clothes and washed what I had been wearing. I am wondering…..how will I feel when businesses, offices, parks, theaters, begin to open up? Will I still hug people? Maybe after a vaccine. This might take a couple of years to sort itself out. Now I am so sad. Taking in this loss. Well, I was right about the couple of years.

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DeAnne M.
I get sad looking at people in masks spread far apart, too. The one nice thing is that I notice mutual waving to passersby when on walks, which is an improvement from the usual keep-to-yourself approach.

Lauren V.K.
Love you Ruth

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DeAnne yes, I find myself going out of my way to make eye contact, do a wave (I swear I’m smiling under this mask!) or say hello or nod to people

DeAnne M.
It helps.

Sabrina A.
DeAnne M. I find the mask wearing such a beautiful gesture of love for strangers, it fills my heart a little.

DeAnne M.
That’s a nice way to look at it

Sabrina A.
DeAnne M. it took my neighborhood a loooooong time to get it together. And the afternoon crowd is still awful, but I bless every unicorn for their efforts.

DeAnne M.
I met up with Jessica for a distanced walk last week (we were like 12 feet away from each other the whole time, in masks, etc). And she wanted to go through Hancock Park (the pretty homes). Anyway, on 4th street, it was like a bizarre thoroughfare of people going both ways, and most were in masks but there were quite a few joggers without masks breathing heavily as they flew past. I kept wanting to say “MASKS!!!” I kept picturing their viruses streaming behind them. But ugh. We moved to 5th street, and magically there were few people, so that was better.

Henrietta C.
I think many of us are moving through the five stages of grief — for losses we feel acutely but can hardly describe…

There was an earthquake. Big enough for me to get up and stand in a secure position.

Isolation Diary: an earthquake adds nicely to the anxiety level. I get it, we humans are only marginally in control. Nature, you got the advantage. What did I control today? Had agency over. Is that the current term? That mistake of two days ago? That mis-purchase of an orange tree? Fixed. I found a place for it, moved pots and soil, dug up invasive plants to make room. Done. And an improvement in the space chosen. I controlled computer entropy and got up and did my half hour of dancing and then, after a cool down, my tai chi, yang style long form. Yes! I changed the filter in my heater/AC system. NOT an easy task. It’s supposed to be, but because of a design flaw, it is not. The task requires a pair of heavy duty pliers and much shouting to the possibly attendant gods. But…done! Then I continued work on a doll I am making for Fig. Many adjustments, ripping out of stitching, stuffing, unstuffing, how can I make this work? Is this better? For at least one element I reached acceptance. This will do. Yes. Thanks, I’ll take it.

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Leon R.
You’re an amazing woman.